Me Han Robado

Published in BCNWEEK
Issue #1
May 19 - 25, 2006

Kool G Rap once rapped, “Look behind you when you walk. That’s how it is, in the streets of New York.” Any New Yorker will tell you that mucho has changed in the Big Apple since Kool G first spit those lyrics. Many of them will reference former mayor Rudy Giuliani, known for cleaning up the city. Not many, however, are sure how, exactly, he did it. Isinuation spread. Giuliani had the homeless people, theives and trouble-makers liquified. Here in Barcelona, one might prescribe the same medicine for a similar problem, crime. No no, not violent crime. Theft in Barcelona is rampant. Within an hour of entering the police station on Nou de la Rambla I had already interviewed 12 different people with much the same story.
First, two young Swedish girls in town to finish their school project, a documentary on skateboarding. Their camera disappeared quickly from under their legs near MACBA, where any self-respecting skateboard-documentary-maker simply must be. Witnesses? Many. Help? None. Police? Bored.
Next, the Dutch girl, feeling utterlyteleurgesteld (I’m sorry, what@!#?) after her camera and bag were smoothly lifted while she was taking pictures of Barca fans celebrating at the fountain of Canaletas. Witnesses? Somewhere in the thousands. Help? Unlikely. Police? Pessimistic.
Third, an older woman from London, walking with her husband when a car pulled in front and two boys came from behind to snatch the bag containing money and some green tickets for some tourist something. How she felt in one word? “Very bad.” Witnesses? As many as are on Las Ramblas at any given moment. Shouts for help? Ignored. Police? Sigue igual, tio. Otro guiri, otro dia.
Fourth, a lovely Irish woman robbed while buying an ice cream (For the love of God! That is going too far!! Ice cream is supposed to be a pure thing, for children and summers and smiles!!! How dare they!?) She cried telling me the story. She was lovely.
All the stories collected there in the police station share several facts. Witnesses were always plentiful. Help was always non-existent. The police listened and questioned with passionless reason, the kind that reflects hopelessness, as if this sort of thing happens all the time. Oh wait. . .it does!
So what can be done? We could, I thought, follow the Giuliani model. So, I asked a friend whom I consider a real New Yorker his thoughts on how Giuliani achieved his goal. He responded, “he cleaned up NY by shutting down all the porno shops and increasing fines for public behavior i.e. drinking in the street, smoking pot, etc. He also instituted laws allowing police to arrest anyone for anything and. . .if they couldn’t find something to lock up a bum (homeless person) for, he instituted a law that stated that one had to have identification or at least a dollar in one’s pocket, or face incarceration for vagrancy. Dude was a scumbag. All NYers know it.”
Oh.
I just don’t see that solution working for Barcelona anyway.Taking sexuality out of the culture. Prohibiting people from having a drink outside, rolling un porro. Nearly forcing them to desire, work for, or at least have the almighty dollar in their pockets.
It all sounds too. . .American.
Maybe we should just listen to Kool G Rap and start “look[ing] behind [us] when [we] walk. That’s how it is, in the streets of [Barcelona].”